your most embarrassing moment naked?

vodafonewtf

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For me, it was when i was still in high school (along long long time ago) my girlfriend's mom had just left the house so my girlfriend placed a blanket down in the family room cranked up the stereo we got completely naked and started going at it. She was on top riding me and all of a sudden she jumped off me and hid behind the sofa. There I was sporting wood in the middle of the room while her mother is staring straight at me. I flipped to my stomach and grabbed the blanket, but the damage was done. She kept yelling at my girlfriend for what seemed forever. Needless to say every time I saw her mom it was very awkward.
 
Having to walk about a half mile to my campsite in Bon Echo park after some little cockheads stole my bathing suit and clothes while I was tanning naked. Fuckers even took my sandals, and I had to walk on those gravel roads barefoot. About three sites away from my campground I was picked up by the park ranger. He was half pissed off, half laughing. I said, "What the fuck am I supposed to do? Hide out until night and you get a call of some naked dude hiding in the bushes? I got my hand over my dick, sorry but under the circumstances it's the best I can do".

Fuck, that sucked.
 
I'm having a shower at an upscale boutique hotel. Bathroom is right across from the door to the hall. Room is large, a junior suite, and the bathroom is also huge, complete with glass shower enclosure big enough for 6.

I'm running late as I'm expecting Mora any minute. Since she's seen me naked many times answering the door in a towel is no big deal. Just lathering up the hair, thinking about what I'm going to do with her which gives me the proverbial "semi" when there is a knock on the door. "Just a sec" I yell. Another knock she doesn't hear me.

I get out dripping suds and grab a towel. The floor is tile and slippery. You guess it. I slip almost doing the splits with each leg going in opposite directions. Towel goes flying. My life passes before my eyes, or I should say the life of my testicles. But I manage to twist my body slightly at the last possible moment thereby narrowly avoiding squishing them between the hard tile and 180 pounds of falling weight.

So there I am sitting in the middle of the tiled floor in a puddle of water with suds in my hair in a full spread eagle. The door opens and I look up to see the maid, who has used her pass key to let herself in to leave the complimentary chocolate on the pillow along with a bottled water and a card with tomorrow's weather forecast.

I guess she must not have seen very many cheap pornos and she doesn't know shes supposed to immediately rip off her clothes and bang me sensless. Instead she gets this shocked expression, mumbles something in french and backs quickly out of the room, slaming the door.
 
I ve had a few but I think the worst was in high school.It was a hot summer day and we my girlfriend and I were swimming in her pool when her parents left us alone to go grocery shopping, both her sisters were out so we were Woo Hoo the house is empty!

So in we go to the living room couch. Long story short, the couch is seperated by a short maybe 3 foot wall from the front door...She leaning back on the couch with her legs spread and im inbetween banging away with the vigor of youth and my swim suit down round my ankles. Clearly we are too much in the moment to hear the car drive up...so we are totally suprised when the door opens 3 feet from our heads and her parents arrive with groceries!
The split second delay while they life the bags in gives her time to cover up and allows me time to jump up and try and pull my swim suit up. (the funny part finally) but as I try and pull my suit up, my foot catches in the fabric so I have one foot thru the leg and the other caught. Im panicking so I am both trying to pull the suit up and push my leg thru while balancing on one leg all at the same time...I start to loose my balance and am pogoing one legged hopping bare assed across the living room trying to push and pull at the same time just as the parents come around the corner....longest 30 seconds of my life as her rather large scary father and larger scarier mother stare at my bare ass and wood as evidence of the scoundrel who was sulling their "innocent" daughter 10 seconds before,turns 16 shades of red before finally having to pull the suit down to finish pulling it up.

they didnt say a word !
The looked disgusted turned and walked into the kitchen, and left us sitting side by side on the couch, we could hear muted voices from the kitchen, while we imagined what form our execution would take....nothing...they just left us trembeling and let us torture our selves with worry...still it was hard to face them at the next bbq and make eye contact and never knowing when they might bring it up...and im sure they enjoyed our suffering more than they would have if they had just shouted at us.
 
I can't tell you the most embarassing moment (it's too embarrassing), but my second worst embarrassing naked moment had to do with me breaking the shower at a client's place, floading his bathroom in the process, falling on my ass in the shower, and swearing like a sailor in french.

Hearing the commotion, the client came knocking on the bathroom door, asking if everything was OK. Before I could catch myself, I replied in a sarcastic and rude tone: "does it fucking sound like everything is OK?".

Poor guy got the real GFE that night! He was a peach though. He refused to accept my offer to refund him to make up for the trouble and to cover the cost of repairing the shower head, and he even made me feel better about my wet racoon look (dripping wet hair and makeup running down from the deluge I made in the bathroom).

There is it. My second worst embarrassing naked moment, although it had nothing to do with the fact of being naked.
 
Want to hear your most embarrasing moment. Come on Genevieve, be a peach. Promise not to laugh :happy:.
 
I don't have any embarassing moments of my own, but I do third the motions to hear/read Gen's MOST embarassing naked moment.
 
Gen.................we all keep checking in to see if you've posted.....we're all waaiiitttiiinnnggg!!!!
smileywaiting.gif
 
Add me to the list Gen... you can't make a statement like that and then leave us all hanging... :gasp:



(As for me... I don't have any embarrassing naked stories... but plenty of semi-nude embarrassing ones! LOL) :shock:
 
Many many years ago...don't want to tell you how many:tongue:

My father threw me a birthday party and invited about 30 people. My GF at the time and myself decided to slip away to the bedroom. She was riding me when my Dad opened the bedroom door which was right across from the kitchen where just about everyone was standing.:gasp:

The thing that bugged me the most was that my Dad just stood there for about 45 seconds staring at my GF's naked body (not to mention all in the kitchen)....then he very gently said "get dressed and come join your party"

She could barely walk out of the bedroom that night...and she left soon after:no:
 
I'm guess they are just less embarrassed by it! LOL :shock:

Think about it... most of the female membership make a living being naked, so it stands to reason they are desensitized by nakedness, and therefore not embarrassed by it.
 
What happened to the good ol' days...when we were born naked, run around the house naked, never to be embarrassed by it...what have we become:neutral:
 
SnWEI.png


[video=google;-1432315846377280008]http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-1432315846377280008#[/video]

Coupled with the opposing images of what the "perfect" naked body should look like as portrayed in the media...
 
Hey, why do you assume I have naked stories? I don't. Not one.

There is a story of something that happened on a naked island, but I had my clothes on at the time so the story is irrelevant to this thread.

And there is a horribly embarrassing boob-flash story, but again there was no nudity so I don't feel the need to share it.

You guys keep going though, this thread is cracking me up. :tongue: :lol:
 
This is not a RL story, but I once had a dream that I was in Sears and I had to go to the bathroom.hhhmmm #2 to be exact.

So I asked the clerk and she pointed to a toilet by the change rooms, right in the middle of the store....no door......no walls no T/P...just a single toilet:gasp:

I had to go REAL bad so off I went pulled down my pants and took a seat, when I looked up all the men that were sitting on the benches waiting for their wives outside the change room were starring at me................SHUT UP CG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:ouch:
 
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    โœจ Looking for a relaxing escape? โœ… Click Here Meet๐ŸŒธTina๐ŸŒธJessica๐ŸŒธIsabellaCall us today for the best treatment and service experience. Click on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates ! Call now โ˜Ž 289 - 298 - 5662โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate relaxation awaits! โœจ
  39. Lilyspa1:
    Lily Spa :๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’• Wednesday Schedule ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณKajal 23, Punjabi girl ๐Ÿ˜ˆGFE & bbbj โค๏ธโค๏ธElena ( Latino ) Big Nature Boobs & SuSu ( Asian )Slim , ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜Porn Service ๐Ÿ”ฅDuo ๐Ÿ”ฅ,โ˜Ž๏ธ 6475318288
  40. Annie Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ANNIE SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLEโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒSCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ (647) 891-9688โ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ (416) 291-8879โ˜Ž๏ธ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 9:30am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ”ฅGORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: ๐Ÿ”ฅ Feifei๐Ÿ˜˜Our new Japanese beauty Feifei specializes in creating an intimate and deeply relaxing massage experience tailored to your desires. Her soft, skilled hands glide effortlessly, easing tension and awakening your senses
  41. Golden Sunshine Spa:
    โœจClick on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates and special services ! โœ… Click Here Today๐ŸŒธAkame๐ŸŒธFran๐ŸŒธXuka๐ŸŒธLynda Call us โ˜Ž 905 - 265 - 2158โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate service awaits! โœจ
  42. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young girls are working today, young flirty Ivy 36DD with big buttocks 30โ€™s and sexy Coco, pretty Ella and cute GFE Lina are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 4163985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome,back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  43. ForeverWarden:
    Wednesday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Bella, Cindy & Sasa. Bella is around 5โ€™3โ€ with a thin to medium build, C Cups, and a pleasing personality. She can offer dfk, bbbj and cfs as well as a good massage experience. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5โ€™4โ€, natural C Cups. Her massage is nice, her services will drive you wild & her finish is a dream
  44. HolidaySpa:
    Wednesday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธ: FIONA, KIKI & CINDY. FIONA is a slim hottie with long dark hair, great melons and ass, and nice services. Kiki is very attractive, young, about 5โ€™4โ€ and 110 Lbs., slim with a banging body. Kiki is very popular for her great attitude and services. CINDY is slim & incredibly sexy
  45. SugarLoveSpa:
    Wednesday at โค๏ธ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’œโŽ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—š๐—”๐—ฅ ๐—Ÿ๐—ข๐—ฉ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”โŽ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜: ELLA, NANCY, SUSAN & TIFFANY. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York, ON โ˜Ž ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฑ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด โ˜Ž ELLA is a lovely Thai sweetheart, 5โ€™1โ€ with C Cups, smooth skin and a very pleasing attitude. NANCY is a curvy and very friendly Spanish girl, who has all the versatile skills you need. SUSAN is a small, slim & sexy Latina girl
  46. luckywellness:
    Lucky Wellness Center 4379721888 295 Eglinton Ave E,Unit 7,Mississauga We had two girls working today. Niko and Kiki. They are both young, pretty and cute. The massage and back walking were very good.
  47. Lulu_Villa_Spa:
    Sami is a gorgeous model type Vietnamese Girl Mia new Vietnamese girl Bella She is Mexican Gorgeous face Natalie she is CBC/filipina mixed Petite girl โ˜Ž๏ธ647- 446-0886
  48. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 5 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ PAOLA, SASHA, AMMU, JANVI, AMANDA, MIMI, PREETI, KIRAN, MONIKA, SALMA ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
  49. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom Spa ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน2 girls ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ5124 Dundas St W Etobicokeโ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366๐Ÿ‘ Table Shower Sea Salt Bath Body Scrub๐Ÿ˜˜ Japanese girl Nina โค๏ธ Natural Big Boobs 38 DD ๐Ÿ˜˜Pink Mini Nipples Hot body slide, super enjoyable๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜ very provocative service๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜, professional super Luna deep tissue massage, has therapeutic effect to loosen bones and relieve muscle pressure and will bring you unexpected service effects, she will bring you a little surprise๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜โค๏ธYou are welcome to make an appoint
  50. DareDevil:
    ARIA WELLNESS โ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธADDRESS: 360 HWY 7, UNIT #6, RICHMOND HILL,647-222-5683 โ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธ(PHONES CALL ONLY, NO TEXT'N AVAILABLE) โ™ฅ๏ธTODAY'S Schedule!โ™ฅ๏ธ Loaded lineup with Beautiful Girls : New Girl Apple, Young RMT Student Helen, Magical Mia and Work out๐Ÿ‹๐Ÿšด๐Ÿ’ช Babe Amy! SPECIAL PROMO 30 MINS 2 GIRLS $70 ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน**TODAY'S PICK OF THE DAY IS ๐Ÿญ๐ŸฌHELEN AND APPLE๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿญ**
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