freind cant take massage

[dantexvergil]

If anyone has an eastern med point of veiw, Id gladly appriate.
I have a freind who cant take massage, she says when someone tries it is too painful.
She is I beleive around 24-25 and has been a victim of abuse and homelessness, she is also a former drug user if that helps.
She also see's an acupuncturist monthly if that helps any.
Does anyone know what the problem is? and if so how I can help, or if I should try not to help.

 

[mistify]

Sounds like there is a lot of emotional trauma which is coming up during the massage.

A few thoughts. If you work on her, I would stay very far away from the abdomen (probably at least until she can accept about 15-20 full body massages. It has been my experience that even though those with emotional trauma need this work, they can't take it easily (not even the lightest of pressure). As a matter of fact, if you ever start this work on her - begin with a gentle light touch for the first few abdominal sessions and nothing more. --- If someone else has seen the opposite need, I think it would be interesting to hear about that as well.

You could possible start out with 5 min. hand sessions. 2 and 1/2 mins. for each hand and see how she does. Then move into the feet for 5 min. sessions associated with the hand sessions. Then possibly add in forearms and then ankle region of legs. Do that for a number of times before branching out further or until she gives you the "go ahead" sign.

From there you may be able to move into the back (prone).

You'll have to take it very slow, I think.

I hope other people will add to this thread with their experiences. It will be an interesting one.

 

[jacks mom]

It sounds as if your friend has had a life time full of emotional and physical pain. With a body/mind/spirit philosophy, (Barnes') Myofascial Release would be a perfect modality for her.

In my experience as a practitioner, people who have endured years of trauma are full of restrictions in their connective tissue, and therefore, have significant pain and limited function, etc. complaints. Most have been
diagonosed with several different 'labels' when actually, with each traumatic experience, their body has tightened up to protect them.

MFR releases these restrictions in a gentle way.

There are many advanced John Barnes' Myofascial Release therapists in your area. You may want to check the therapist directory on the website for a practitioner (can't post the site but it's myofascial release dot com--no spaces).

Good luck to you and your friend,

Barbara Long, PTA/MT

 

[Hiram]

So, Barbara, would you mind explaining how you would go about working on a client like this. What would your steps consist of? I, for one, would really be interested in hearing more.

 

[Real Deal CowGirl]

When I met my husband, he couldn't handle massages either. He had this odd quirk, of when anyone touched his back, he had an urge to protect himself, fist cocked type idea.

I started out with him extremely light, and to begin with no movement. I placed my hands on his shoulders, upper back, and just stayed there, over clothing. When he was comfortable with that, I lifted my hands, and moved them placing them back down. We then progressed to effleurage. Now he can take full massages

Starting out like this may be one way. Start with energy work if she will take it. And then go on from there, maybe even start over her clothng. If she has had a rough life, she may be very protective, and defensive. You will need to work with in those boundaries, until she builds up trust in you as a therapist.

Give her full control, what you do, where you work, how hard, how light, keep in contact. See how it goes from there

 

[Pompal 09.]

I am in agreement with Myhrra on the energy work. A really good energy worker can do some amazing things for past trauma. Pueppi's suggestions for starting out slowly are great,too. Here is an article form massage and bodywork magazine:
http://www.massageandbodywork.com/Articles/FebMar2006/missing.html

The Ethics of Touch by Ben Benjamin and Cherie Sohnen-Moe has a lot of info on working with trauma survivors as well:

http://www.theethicsoftouch.com/

If you continue to work with this person, make sure you fully ground and protect yourself, too.

 

[Henna]

I have had several clients who could not tolerate masaage,and Reiki helped so much to release emotional trauma.....but prepare for alot of tears and post session depression. I find that after 2-3 sessions of Reiki will be more tolerent to physical touch. Good luck with things,go slow and follow their body's signals and adjust the session accordingly.Ground yourself well and things should be OK.

Namaste,
Johnny

 

[heather123]

Certain types of Shiatsu can be really helpful too, since they can be done very gently, and mostly energetically, and have the added benefit of being done on a clothed client, which seems to help the client feel a little more protective.

 

[yvette30011]

freind cant take massage

I have a freind who cant take massage, she says when someone tries it is too painful....Does anyone know what the problem is? and if so how I can help, or if I should try not to help.

I have a question. Does your friend want to receive massage? Or is this something you think she should experience. If your friend wants to receive massage, then the advice already given is great. Begin with light techniques that can be done fully clothed. Energywork is wonderful. Then start with hand & foot massage -- using gentle pressure, and progress from there. However, if your friend hasn't asked for your help in this area, I don't think it's appropriate to try to force the issue. Massage isn't for everyone, and that's OK.

 

[donya d]

freind cant take massage

I have a freind who cant take massage, she says when someone tries it is too painful....Does anyone know what the problem is? and if so how I can help, or if I should try not to help.

I have a question. Does your friend want to receive massage? Or is this something you think she should experience. If your friend wants to receive massage, then the advice already given is great. Begin with light techniques that can be done fully clothed. Energywork is wonderful. Then start with hand & foot massage -- using gentle pressure, and progress from there. However, if your friend hasn't asked for your help in this area, I don't think it's appropriate to try to force the issue. Massage isn't for everyone, and that's OK.

You are very correct, I never actually considered that element. Before I continue I should definetly ask.

It sounds as if your friend has had a life time full of emotional and physical pain. With a body/mind/spirit philosophy, (Barnes') Myofascial Release would be a perfect modality for her.

I would agree with you there but I only know shiatsu and some swedish :-(

 

[Trust Me]

Im also thinking of a little rosen method.
Unfortunetly Im not trained in talk therapy or the specifics of that method but it would be a fun research project.