Question Farting in the room

I’m surprised our resident shit lover doesn’t chime in here. He sends me pictures of his unhealthy shit. My opinion is that he will die young. He has really bad digestion
 
I still remember on one of my visits, I was giving one of the girls daty... I said to her you taste a bit funny down there. She says to me you were to quick, i forgot to tell you I'm on my period....OMG..😫😱🤑
Maybe she thought she finished her period there was no pad....I felt like a vampire from that day onwards....
I'm surprised you'd still do it after that
 
I went to a spa on Midland recently, and the middle aged pork chop farted constantly throughout the session. Clearly audible. I went back with vengeance on my mind and just stank the place up. I didn’t shower for 2 days beforehand either. I’ve suspected some hot chicks in the past of floating an air biscuit during the session, but nothing audible. Anyone dealt with this? What do you do?
bullshit. you will actually abstain from showering 2 days so that you can seek your revenge? If you smell like shit, the girl will make you to take a shower.
 
An escort once farted as she came hard while I was going down on her. A little stinky, but I knew it was an accident so I didn't say anything about it, and neither did she.

Not quite "mes compliments au chef" for my daty skills, but I'll always remember it lol
This happens to me with two of my semi regular girls during daty, one “toots” and shakes the table lightly, one lets it rip as she orgasms - first time she was embarrassed but I laughed it off and told her I took it as a compliment and she didn’t need to worry, we’re very comfortable together now and I’m a bit louder on occasion with her than other girls myself so all good. Another one didn’t fart but squirted during daty without warning me - six times….when it was my turn her first words were- don’t cum in my mouth ok🤦🏼
 
I still remember on one of my visits, I was giving one of the girls daty... I said to her you taste a bit funny down there. She says to me you were to quick, i forgot to tell you I'm on my period....OMG..😫😱🤑
Maybe she thought she finished her period there was no pad....I felt like a vampire from that day onwards....
Happened to me with my first girlfriend- I was 18 and she was 16….we were camping in a tent with another couple who had the tent right next to us, afterwards I got up to go to the public washrooms for a pee and my friend’s girlfriend asked how I got the nosebleed….
 
Out of curiosity, has any one had FS with a SW on her period? I never cared with girlfriends, but with at an MP it would be awkward.
Yes - I have a regular who loves sex during her period. She tells me I’m the only one who is willing to help her out at that time so she let’s me know when she starts and I see her on her third day. She’s a very clean lady and after 3 days only has light bleeding and no pain so all comfortable…. Don’t see her every month during her period but do see her a couple of times a month.
 
Happened to me with my first girlfriend- I was 18 and she was 16….we were camping in a tent with another couple who had the tent right next to us, afterwards I got up to go to the public washrooms for a pee and my friend’s girlfriend asked how I got the nosebleed….
Nothing like waking up with a lump in your throat and a string out of your mouth
 
This happens to me with two of my semi regular girls during daty, one “toots” and shakes the table lightly, one lets it rip as she orgasms - first time she was embarrassed but I laughed it off and told her I took it as a compliment and she didn’t need to worry, we’re very comfortable together now and I’m a bit louder on occasion with her than other girls myself so all good. Another one didn’t fart but squirted during daty without warning me - six times….when it was my turn her first words were- don’t cum in my mouth ok🤦🏼
That's a real funny one. Isn't cum full of vitamins and protein?
 
Happened to me with my first girlfriend- I was 18 and she was 16….we were camping in a tent with another couple who had the tent right next to us, afterwards I got up to go to the public washrooms for a pee and my friend’s girlfriend asked how I got the nosebleed….
What was your explanation? Just curious.
That reminds me about one guy at work told me he was giving his wife DATY during a family vacation. The next morning, he forgot to clean and brush his teeth, and some kid asked him why his breath smelled like fish.
 
What was your explanation? Just curious.
That reminds me about one guy at work told me he was giving his wife DATY during a family vacation. The next morning, he forgot to clean and brush his teeth, and some kid asked him why his breath smelled like fish.
Told her I hadn’t noticed and it had gone away by next morning…mom asked also about the blood on my white t-shirt…told her my girlfriend had borrowed it when she slept in the other tent with my friend’s girlfriend….she must have had a nosebleed…
 
Told her I hadn’t noticed and it had gone away by next morning…mom asked also about the blood on my white t-shirt…told her my girlfriend had borrowed it when she slept in the other tent with my friend’s girlfriend….she must have had a nosebleed…
I was going to say, you could've said you forgot to take your high blood pressure medication. But that excuse wouldn't work for a teenager.
 
That's a real funny one. Isn't cum full of vitamins and protein?
Vitamin “E” (ejaculate)
One lady had me on a two day diet of chocolate covered almonds and fruit before I would see her for a sweeter taste. Had an annual checkup done same day I saw her once and Doctor told me to cut back on sweets or risk diabetes…..tough choice but I do miss her….
 
Vitamin “E” (ejaculate)
One lady had me on a two day diet of chocolate covered almonds and fruit before I would see her for a sweeter taste. Had an annual checkup done same day I saw her once and Doctor told me to cut back on sweets or risk diabetes…..tough choice but I do miss her….
Chocolate covered almonds? Unnecessary. You can stick with some lower calorie foods like cucumbers and pineapple.
 
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